


i fear the fall and where we'll land

by rvnwyn



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Gen, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-21
Updated: 2019-10-21
Packaged: 2020-12-27 13:55:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21119897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rvnwyn/pseuds/rvnwyn
Summary: In the past, when he felt like he could do anything behind the comforting shadow of Batman's cape, Jason used to come to this building and stand at the very edge. He felt invincible, looking down at the city from afar, dressed in that ridiculously bright colored suit.And in the end, not even the suit had protected him.





	i fear the fall and where we'll land

**Author's Note:**

> Companion Piece and Title - "Beautiful Crime" by Tamer.

This used to be the tallest building in Gotham. It had a clear view of Gotham Square, and when you focused hard enough, you could even see the docks and the water.

In the past, when he felt like he could do anything behind the comforting shadow of Batman's cape, Jason used to come to this building and stand at the very edge. He felt invincible, looking down at the city from afar, dressed in that ridiculously bright colored suit.

And in the end, not even the suit had protected him.

Now, Jason sits at his favorite spot in the roof, his arm leaning against his dark red helmet, surrounded by skyscrapers that were built while he was gone. They block his view. He can't see the docks anymore.

How had Gotham changed so much, yet everything was still the same?

What a shame.

Jason was so lost in thought that if he hadn't been trained, he would have probably gotten scared to death and fallen twenty stories down when Dick called for him from the small hatch in the middle of the roof. 

"Hey, Babybird!" Dick said as he sat down next to Jason, casual enough to make him believe that that they weren't sitting with their legs swinging hundreds of meters above the ground.

This had become somewhat of a usual routine for them. Once or twice a month, if they were lucky enough, they would sit together in silence until the sun rose up over Gotham. But luck wasn't easy to come by in this cursed city, Jason always thought, and Dick would leave, talking into his earpiece and mumbling about some emergency; hostages at the docks, gang wars in Bludhaven, Blackgate escapees terrorizing citizens, Batman needing help to fight some supervillain who threatened to take over Gotham once again. 

As Dick left, he would always ask Jason to come back to the Manor sometime. Alfred will bake cookies, he would say. We missed you a lot.

Jason never said anything back.

"So, how are you doing?"

A question he was always saw coming. A question he was too afraid to answer.

Jason wanted to say he was tired. Tired of waking up with nightmares of being trapped in a coffin six feet under the ground. Tired of seeing a crowbar and a sick smile every time he dared to close his eyes. Tired of feeling so helpless and angry all the time. Tired of being so alone.

Instead, just like always, Jason kept quiet. Even that silence once Jason deemed so comfortable, he was tired of. 

And suddenly everything he had been holding back just came all at once before he could stop it.

"You always told me our families were in heaven." Jason hadn't realized how long he was quiet for until hearing how hoarse his voice was.

Dick slightly furrowed his eyebrows and opened his mouth to say something, but Jason spoke hurriedly, like he was afraid of what Dick would say if he got the chance. "You told me that they were in heaven and back then, I desperately wanted to believe it. That my mom and your parents were somewhere safe, watching and protecting us from afar. But when I died, I didn't see anything, Dick. Just darkness."

Jason took a deep and shaky breath and continued staring ahead. 

"Maybe you were never supposed to stay."

And for the first time that night, Jason turned his head to the side and looked at Dick. He had several bruises across his cheeks and one over his left eye, and his suit was covered in mud. And yet, he still had that soft smile on his lips, looking at Jason with soft eyes and living like nothing had ever happened.

That wasn't true, they both knew that. Jason had never been the only one who had been through shit. It wasn't fair he kept pretending he was.

Jason was suddenly overwhelmed with such a sense of shame and guilt that he had to turn away.

He felt a warm hand on his back. The last time someone touched him affectionately was when he had hugged Bruce after Bruce apologized due to a small fight in the Cave. It was before the -

It was before.

"Come home, Jay."

No explanations or excuses tonight. Just a simple request.

"Maybe tomorrow."

Apparently, Dick was okay with that, because a smile that was more genuine than the former appeared on his face and reached his eyes.

It was enough.


End file.
